I have been introduced to a fabulous new and SAFE website...Redbubble! Here I can upload my images of my paintings and photographs of the world that I love so dearly - flowers, animals and scenery, Mother Nature at her finest! It is now possible to purschase my work via Redbubble in the form of greeting cards, prints and calendars...go on, have a look! http://gardenjools.redbubble.com

Having chased away the scarey demons of depression, through moving to a warmer climate and a slower pace...I have been able to secure some treatment that is actually helping me! Physiotherapy is a session I look forward to! Although, at the times, it is a painful excursion..the benefits I experience after the fact include less pain and more mobility...yahooey!
Because of my new found freedom (of sorts!!) I have been exploring other means to keep myself busy and my head/heart happy!  I have discovered a place where I can help others and am working towards goals and dreams... myspace.com/planetcarenews  it is here that I see the need for more people to join a common cause. It is here that I see real people striving towards a common goal and that is to make our world a better place for animals as well as us!
I sometimes write for this site, but mostly I just help by getting others to join in. Just recently ...I have donated 35 paintings to Planet Care. The proceeds will be divided throughout their network of activists and helping to maintain the good work they do!  Now I am feeling good!!! Please go to my site at myspace.com/gardenjools and have a look. Go to  myspace.com/planetcare go to myspace.com/planetcarenews and see what is going on! Thanks xxxx

For more info on The Kimberley region, please go to
myspace.com/savethekimberley     or
www.savethekimberley.com

Surely most Australians would know of The Kimberley Region in Western Australia. It is a place that can be considered a National treasure for its untouched and spiritual beauty. It is a place that I personally have goals of going to and wish for it to remain the natural historic environment that it is! The Government however have plans to surge right through the guts of it with a gas pipeline, even though the infrastructure is already set up for the Pilbara...go figure??? The way to stop this monumental pack rape of this region is to nominate it for World Heritage listing, an invisible fence to keep the area from degrading! Should this eventuate, it will also promote Australia as a leader of conservation, provide jobs and employment across the country and raise millions of dollars in tourism revenue. It is so easy to do!! I have done it myself...please go to
http://www.environment.gov.au/heritage/nominating/index.html
How does it feel to be able to help? Damn fine, damn fine!!!

Earlier this year fires in Australia, snuffed out 200 lives and left thousands injured and homeless - that is the human statistics!! The wildlife left in the same predicament are left even more devastated and more ongoing care is needed. I am donating 3 paintings, from which ALL proceeds shall be collectively given to this appeal. Bidding starts at $100 and starts today! Bidding closes on the 30th April 2009. To make a bid please leave as a comment on the selected paintings and I shall get back to you!!  Paintings donated are: "Like watching grass grow" - 60cm x 60cm Acrylic on canvas. "Hibiscus" - 120cm x 100 cm Acrylic on canvas and "Still" -  60cm x 60cm Acrylic on canvas. These paintings are displayed in "My photos".

"BUT".... I am still here!

I tell you..I have come so close to giving up. Thoughts of ending it all seemed so much easier than going on and fighting until I drop dead anyway!  But...(yes there is a but!) I have managed to fight and kick and scream and swear and finally....get some treatment!!! The first part was a steroid injection - right into that very, very soft bit in the middle of the groin!!  That was hard to do. I had 3 weeks of painless bliss. I was much slower with my walking, but I did not have the pain I had become accustomed to over the past 2 years...then it wore off. Oh ok... what can I do now. My GP kept suggesting physio, I had been knocked back on physio before because Drs had presumed my pain was the result of an injured back (I kept telling them..my back does not bloody hurt! It was only after 9 or 10 mths of pure anxiety and pushing and pushing, that got my the MRI I had been asking for, was finally granted and they established that my back was fine!!!!) Physio gives me hope. Physio gives me a chance. If the Drs had been allowed to test me as requested, they would have found that 2 years ago!!! and..my treatment would have been simple and effective. Now.. I am looking at enjoying my life again, but not working. It fills my heart with despair to actually sat that.

For the past week I have been watching the absolute horror of the southern bushfires unfold (along with the rest of the world!). As each day brought more news, more images and more emotions..I found myself sinking further and further into an unstoppable melancholy. At first I felt the pain and fear of so many, then I felt the overwhelming anxiety of the situation getting worse! My own mood was foundering and my spirits sank, my imagination took a journey to "what if it happened to me???...how would I cope, how would I get out should a fire threaten my home. I began to feel hopeless and hated my physicality (there is no way I would have been able to get myself or my daughter to safety had I been within the reach of those fires) so much that I almost gave up on myself!!!
But then, I forced myself to return to my studio and without too much of a plan, began to paint. What kept haunting me, was the eyes of the people in those fires. What they saw and how those eyes must be feeling. How the smoke and heat would have effected them...out came "My eyes are tired, they hurt, I cannot see"...its not just a a view of those eyes that I painted, it is a look inside the hearts as well. Then...I decided that I may just be able to help by selling this painting and donating the whole price back to the fundraising efforts for the people that inspired it. $1000 is certainly no where near the cost of the subject.
Please contact me if you are interested!

A pinch and a punch for the first of the month! It is now 4 mths since landing back here....and I am so pleased I did!
My injured leg still restricts me endlessly and is the cause of melancholy at times, but because I am somewhere I love, I can endure it far better than where I had been previously. I think that my paintings are testimony to that as well, as I see that I am more focused and my paintings give me a different kind of release. Yes they always provided an escape for me and my usage of colours lifted my spirits, but now it is much more than that...I feel settled and am at ease. Rather than trying to bolster my self esteem and confidence, I am now painting with a different attitude...it is an attitude of "I CAN do this!"
My first exhibition in "The Woolgoolga Art and Craft Gallery" is about to unfold! and I am very excited to be able to share what I do with people I know from around this district. I can honestly say, that there is an almost "electric" buzz going around and friends and acqaintences are so very keen to see my work displayed and be there with me on the night. If they were unable to attend on the 6th Feb...thats ok, as my work will be up for the remainder of Feb...its all good!

Well.....here I am, almost one month later!  Some things here have changed after 25 years and some have not. What has changed is the new houses, the new streets, the old streets with new names, the new people. What has not changed is the people who are still here and still call me friend! The ocean still smells the same on the breeze...it still carries the sound of the waves, rolling in one after the other. The gardens are more established and the bush that remains has been incorporated into the new building blocks as we spread further and further up the coast.
My own piece of paradise here is superb. I have the best of both worlds, where I am just out of town, far enough out to have my peace and quiet, but close enough to not feel isolated. I wake up each morning listening to the birds, watching kangaroos graze on my lawn and marvelling at the pureness of nature where I am.
I have unpacked all the boxes and added my signature here, feeling like I am home. My new studio has been set up and organised, I have painted two new paintings (scenes out of my garden here!) and feel quite relaxed. My youngest daughter has settled in nicely too, starting at her new school, making new friends and exploring new places...learning all the time! We have visited the beach on many occasions and it is wonderful to have it so close, finding treasures along the shore line is one of our favourite things to do.
I have started the process of staging an exhibtition here in my own yard (I have spoken to my daughters school with the offer of an exhibition that I wish to donate to the school from, in exchange for help setting it up. I am now waiting for their reply) I have also been offered 2 other exhibtions locally and am generating interest from many sources. It is very exciting and is such a thrill to be doing this..it almost makes me forget my health issues.
I am someone who lived here 25 yrs ago and has returned. I too am the same, but have changed in different ways. The pace here is much slower and suits my abilities far more. The temperatures are warmer here, so I do not have the aches and pains that I had to deal with not that long ago and my spirit feels free and unencumbered by expectations or regulations incurred by peole who do not understand.
It is so good to see the faces of people I knew and loved so many years ago, once again! It is so good to feel the space around me, to use my senses and appreciate. It is so good to be able to offer a different lifestyle to my children and live it myself with them. It is a good mix of new and old.